Live Like There's No Tomorrow
by envaok
Summary: People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute". After the devastating news, how will Rory continue her life. Rogan
1. When everything's made to be broken

…

**This is my first fiction I've ever written, so please go easy on me :) **

**This chapter is just some sort of prologue, gives you some idea what to expect from this story.**

**Details you should know… It is Rory's last year in college, but Logan did not leave for London. **

**I do not own anything.**

"Ms. Gilmore, you have leukemia" said the doctor without any emotions. "I'd like you to take some more tests before we start the treatments."

Treatments? What kind of treatments does he talk about? I am not that sick, maybe I haven't felt perfect in the last couple of months, but I'm young, have never been sick for more than a week.

"I know is must be hard for you to hear this alone, would you like me to tell your friend to come inside?" I nodded without even looking at him. The realization hit me, I could die, and I did not seem to accept this fact that easily. I have dreams, I have a future that I am so close to achieve.

RLRLRLRRLRLRL

"Mr. Huntzberger" says the doctor Rory just walked in with 2 minutes ago. "I think your friend needs you" I can tell something is not right.

"What happened, Mr. Cooper?"

"I cannot tell you anything."

I started to be scared. Doctors do not like to play with people. They know how important their rule in society is, and they do not like to mess around. As I walk in the room, I see Rory lying on the floor. Not knowing what to say, I sit down slowly and put my arms around her. We are alone in the office; the silence is filled with Rory's tears that drop on the flour.

"shh…Rory, what happened?" I whisper in her ears pulling her as close as I possibly can.

"Logan…." Her mouth almost touches my ear; she whispers silently "I just… need you… I need you more than ever."

The worlds are sinking in, while my heart breaks into tiny peaces. What could possibly be so bad? Nothing can happen with Ace, with My beautiful, perfect, stunning, smart, fabulous Ace.

"shhh… I will never leave you Ace." I whisper in her ears and kiss the top of her head. I want to confront her, hug her and never let her go. Never let anything to happen to her.

"Logan…" Tears have formed in her eyes and she looks at me helplessly. I hate seeing her this way, full of pain. Those eyes, those sparkly blue eyes are red with black shade. I cannot believe how broken she looks. "I…" she starts to cry again "I don't even know how to say it"

"Ace, you do not have to say anything until you're ready. I will wait here as long as I need to." She gives me a weak smile and puts her head on my shoulder. She does not cry any more, she is just gathering her thoughts.

We spend 10 minutes listening to the silence, when Rory starts to whisper something into my ears.

"Logan…." She pauses. "The doctor said I have leukemia"

_And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight_

And I don't want the world to see me  
Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's made to be broken  
I just want you to know who I am

**Please review. Otherwise I think it was terrible and will never continue. But even if that's the case, please tell me…lol:)**


	2. Yesterday love was such an easy game

_**Thanks for those who took the time and reviewed. I really do appreciate it.**_

_**gilmoreluver06: The questions are great but if I'd answer you, there would be no point to read the story anymore. You'll find out everything as the story goes on. I know it's not the answer you looked for but I'll do my best to answer your questions in the story.**_

_**But if something is not clear as you read the story pm me, or just tell me in the review and I'll describe everything.**_

_**When you see RLRL that means I changed the POV and when you see -- that means the time has changed, but I guess it was pretty clear for everyone.**_

_**I don't own anything.**_

10 PM, at the apartment

"Logan, I want you to make love to me." Since we got home, I did not know what to say, or do to make her feel better. And than here she comes with the most surprising question I've every received. I glance at her to make sure that's what she wants, and see the desire in her eyes.

I lean down and kiss her slowly, enjoying every moment of it. The kiss shows all the emotions we felt today. Love, disappointment, fear, insecurity, infinite. I lean my hand on her cheeks and smile at her as we break apart.

"I love you, Rory Gilmore with all of my heart." I say to her, looking into those sparkly blue eyes of hers. "You're the most amazing person I've ever met…you have beautiful eyes…" I press a small kiss on her eye. "the most kissable lips" I kiss her lips and than move on to her neck slowly, as I know she likes. "I love how your breath quickens when I kiss your neck, and most importantly I love that if I kiss this spot over her… "I move to the spot where her neck and shoulder meets" You lose control, and I can do whatever I want to you" I look into her eyes, but they are already closed, as she enjoys the feeling of caring, the feeling of love.

I take of her t-shirt, as I continuously press kisses everywhere on her body. She moans silently, as I move to her breast, and press kisses all over them. As I kisses one, I massage the other with my hand, to make it more enjoyable, and as I see her face, it works. She smiles between the moans. Her eyes are closed, enjoying the blindness of the perfect love.

My hands start to wander around and massage her legs as it gets closer to the goal. I take of her pants, but I do not move my mouth from her breast. She feels perfect, and she taste amazing, I could never have enough of her. After I took care of her underwear I feel how wet she is. I move my moth to her stomach and press some kisses on it really fast, as I move down a little bit until I reach her sex, and I press small kisses all around it

"Logan" She screams. "Oh my god."

I look up at her and smile. How perfect she looks when she is so close to an orgasm. I lick inside of her and circle around, slowly, but passionately. She tastes perfect, and I want more. I do it a little faster, and it drives her crazy. Her breath is so quick, her moans are telling me she is really close, and than I press the next kiss at her lips.

She opens her eyes and stares at me kinda surprised for a second until she feels my erection entering her.

"I want to make love to you" I whisper in her ears as I press a small kiss on it. "I want you to know my love is stronger than anything"

"I am so in love with you, Logan"

I am deep inside of her by now, and I start to move slowly, enjoying the sight of the beauty under me. I kiss her with all the passion I feel, our tongues touch each other. It feels perfect. I move faster and faster each time, but not losing control.

This night is about Rory and I want it to be as perfect as our love is. I cannot lose control, but it is harder than I thought. Rory can cause orgasm just by letting me to watch her naked, and now, at this very moment she is the most beautiful creature I've ever seen, moaning my name and asking me to move faster. But I can't. I want this night to be special. I want her to feel, to touch, to see my love.

"Logan,…faster"

"Patient" I whisper between two kisses. "You are so beautiful"

She blushes a little, opens her eyes and smiles at me. The blue eyes are filled with desire, and love. I move faster and I don't know how much longer I can keep the control. She drives me crazy with those small tricks she does to me.

"Logan, I'm almost there… I love to feel you inside me"

I love when she says things like that. Rory is not that kinda girl, and it is really sexy when she forgets about it.

I fuck her as fast as I can, as I am losing control and just hoping that she only has seconds until her orgasm, because I probably don't have more.

"LOGAN!!" she screams as her body experiences the feelings of unconditional love.

We both lay next to each other, smiling, not thinking of anything. For the first time of the day our life is normal, just like yesterday. I put my arms around her shoulders and whisper in her ears.

"Everything is going to be ok; I'll be always there for you."

We don't talk any more, but we can't sleep either. Just breathe in and out, enjoying every second of being alive, being young, and being in love. Because as we learned it today, nobody knows what tomorrow might bring.

RLRLRLRL

I look at the watch without moving any part of my body. It is 4 AM, and I still haven't slept. I feel Logan's arms around my body, and his breathes on my neck. I know he is not sleeping either, but I don't turn around. I don't want to face the facts. It is just perfect, sleeping, or at least lying next to the one boy I'm in love with, and nothing else matters. We still have 4 hours to enjoy this perfection, before we have to make that conversation, before our world falls apart.

Logan gets up carefully, trying his best not to wake me. He goes to the kitchen and probably prepares some coffee for me. I love how he knows what I need. Sometimes I feel like he is a part of me, like he knows everything I need.

--

After 20 minutes he comes into the room, with cinnamon rolls, and some coffee in his hands, smiling at me and pressing a small kiss on my lips, as he hands over those.

"Did you sleep well, Ace?

"Yes, How about you?" I lie to him.

"Me too, me too" He lies back, not like any of us would really think the other could sleep at all.

"so…" he says and I already knows where this conversation leads. I am not ready, but at the same time I don't think I'll ever be. I had a whole day to think about what the doctor said, and I already made my decision.

"_Mrs. Gilmore" the doctor looks at me with that serious face. Logan puts his arms around me, trying to confront me. "__Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia or as we often call the CLL is a condition characterized by an accumulation of abnormal lymphocytes in the blood and the bone marrow. These lymphocytes do not perform their functions as normal ones would and interfere with the production of other blood cells necessary for the normal functioning of the blood, leading to a host of complications like deficiency of the immune system, coagulation problems, swollen lymph nodes, and many other conditions." _

_I look at him, not completely know what he is talking about._

"_So what do__es this exactly mean?" Logan asks the doctor "What kinds of treatments are available?"_

"_This type of leukemia affects the lymphocytes, which controls the body's immune response by finding and destroying foreign substances, such as viruses." The doctor says looking at both of us. „__It currently has no cure but new research is bringing new approaches to manage the disease and we hope that the day a complete cure is found is very near."_

„_WHAT??" Logan looks at him with wild eyes. „You are telling me that this type has no cure??"_

„_Calm down, Mr. Huntzberger." Says the doctor. „What I am saying is that there is no specialized cure for this type, but different treatments are available and it can slow down the leukemia. As I said hundreds of professors work on finding the cure. I do believe it will be found in the very close future."_

_I just stare at my shoes, not knowing what to say or do. Gilmores always know what to say, it is some kind of given talent, but it has gone away. _

"_I would suggest you to go home and think about it. Ms. Gilmore either responds to the treatments, lives 2-3 years, and pray for the cure to be discovered, or she does not respond to the treatments and most likely die in a year or so." Says the doctor with this annoyingly calm voice, like it would be so natural to talk about dying when someone is as young as I am._

"_Rory, let's go." Logan grabs my hand and we run outside as far from the hospital as we can. _

"…so"

"Look Rory, I know you don't want to talk about it, and believe me I understand. But I don't think there will be a right time to do this. So we might as well get over it." He used my name, my real name. It feels weird, but I know when he is serious, he likes to call me Rory.

"You are right" I say "Look, I searched on the internet yesterday, and Mr. Cooper was right. There is no cure for this type of leukemia yet. I made my decision and I don't think anyone, or anything can change it"

He stares at me not knowing how to respond.

"Logan, I'm 22. As I understood yesterday I either live 3 years in pain, waiting for the cure to be discovered, or live 1 year, how I want to, without the pain, without the smell of the hospital, without all the mess." I look deep into his brown eyes and I see the fear in them. "I want to live; I want to experience everything before I die. I will not respond to the treatments"

"Rory! But you…. You have to" Tears appears on his cheeks as he falls on the bed. "Rory, I find the best hospital and the best doctors for you. I donate all of my money to them to find the cure. I'll do everything but you can't just give up."

"Logan" I sit next to him and now I am the one who tries to confront him. I've never seen him crying. He is always happy, sees the good things in life, but not now, not when we are talking about death. "You have to understand. I had so many dreams, I wanted to do so many things, but I've never had the time for those. Now I have one whole year just for me, for us, for my family…"

"You can't be that selfish Rory" Now he screams at me. "You can't just think about yourself. What about me, what about your MOM, Rory? How will you tell her not to plan you 24th birthday, because you won't be around"

"Logan, look at the bright side. I have one year to enjoy my life, to enjoy being around you, or my mom." I scream back. "I am not self-fish, you just don't understand"

"I….I…I...don't understand??" Logan screams even louder "than who do you think sat next to you yesterday, who do you think I did not sleep a minute last night, just thinking about how to find the best doctor for you?? You are the one who doesn't understand."

He yells a me the last words and he runs out of the apartment, not even looking back.

Yesterday,  
All my troubles seemed so far away,  
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,  
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

RLRLRRL

Have you ever experienced, that your life ran out of your hands? The plans, the dreams, the future you imagined has gone away. Fear, and insecurity were the only things left, and instead of acting you just sat and cried out loud. Even though you knew that's not the best option you could do, you did not feel strong enough to fight, or your dreams seemed so far away.

Sitting in my car and driving to nowhere seemed the best to do after this intense morning. Passing the green trees seemed ironic. The sign of the spring has come, but the clouds above my head reminded me, not every spring brings good news.

After 2 hours of driving, an idea came to my mind.

"Huntzberger" He says not even bothering to check who's calling

"Dad, what are you doing?"

"I'm working at home. What do you want Logan?"

"Meet me in an hour? It's important" I say calmly, trying to avoid all the emotion that has overcome me in the last 24 hours.

"Sure, come on over" and he hug up.

The plan seemed so perfect; I just had to figure out how I'm going to tell him.

--

"Sit down son" I take my seat, as I look into his eyes. "So what is so important, that you risked coming into this house and meeting me?" He was right; I never come here, if I don't have to. Never. But today was different; the issue I came here to talk about was worth this risk.

"I have a deal for you" He looks curious. "Please don't say unthing until I finish what I want to say."

"Alright"

"Let me not to work this year"

"NONONO…Logan. Don't be insane. Finally you do your job, you grew up this year. What are you…"

"Dad you agreed not to say anything until I'm done" He nods, but his head is red. I swear I could see steam coming out of his ear. "If you let me not to work this year, I sign a paper that says I'm all yours for the rest of my life. I'll go wherever, and whenever you want me too."

His faced turned from angry to surprised. "What? Why would you do that? You hate me, you hate working for me, and you love your freedom."

"I sign the paper, but I'm not telling you why."

"Ok, I guess I can only benefit from this." Of course, he had to remind me who I was talking to. The great Mitchum does not care about anything until he benefits from it. And right now it came handy.

"I'll sign the paper, as soon as your lawyers are done with it. But I want to be clear. I will stop working on Monday, and I want one year without work, without your phone calls about business."

"I'll talk to my lawyers today"

"One more thing, I want to keep my credit card, apartment, cars, jet and the helicopter"

"I guess I'll make you to work hard enough for those next year." He smiled at me.

"Thanks" I nodded, realizing I just sold myself to the evil.

"Are you sure you are ok?" I nod again "Than I'll call my lawyers to put together the contract by tonight. Would you like to come back, or sign it tomorrow?"

"Tonight"

"Than I'll see you soon." I walk out the room, thinking that it tuned out better than I've thought.

--

After signing the paper I called the apartment but nobody was there, than I figured she must go home, and probably cries on her mom's shoulder. I was wondering if she told her, why she is upset, or just that we had a fight.

As I got inside the apartment I saw it was empty, and really silent. I walked around thinking what I should do when I saw that Rory left her laptop working on the bad. I went over there, to save her work and turn it off, when I saw it was a long list, called "MY Top 100"

I laughed a little than started to read. It wasn't finished yet, but I loved the idea, it was so Rory. I was staring at the list and realized what a great person she really is. Her list involved everyone. There were things she wanted to do with her mom, dad, little sister, the town she grew up at, and things she wanted to do with me. After my breakout this morning, I did not think she would make me a part of her dreams, the part of her top 100.

I rushed into the closet and put some of our stuff into a luggage. Before I would leave the house I grabbed her laptop. Driving down to Stars Hallow has never seemed so long.

"_Hey, Jake."_

"_Mr. Huntzberger, what can I help with?" he answered to the phone._

"_Well, if I say I'll give you an extra premium, when could you be ready?"_

"_In an hour. If it's ok?!"_

"_See you in an hour than"_

And I knew I had a great plan for tonight.

--

"Hey Ace"

"Logan?...Why are you calling? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, if you're ok. What are you doing?"

"Sleeping? At least trying if you'd let me" I knock on the door. "People must go crazy today. Someone is knocking… Look I'm fine. I'll talk to you tomoroow…God I'm going….so good night Logan." And she hung up.

"Hey beautiful" I smile and kiss her. She is speechless, and it's so cute.

"How? We were just talking…"

"Let's go Rory" I grab her hand

"What are you talking about? It's midnight"

"I'm well aware of that, Rory." I press a kiss on her lips. "Please, I want you to come with me."

She looks into my eyes and runs back to the hose. I'm confused. I know I've hurt her, but I try to make up for her. She has to understand. I mean everyone would freak out in my position. And just when I start to turn around and walk back to my car I feel her hands on my shoulders hugging me. I look at her surprised.

"I thought… I thought you really wouldn't come."

"Of course I'll go. I would go everywhere with you." She smiles and kisses me. It feels so good.

"I love you. You know that, right?" I whisper into her ears.

"Of course, I do. Otherwise you wouldn't be here." I look into her eyes and see tears coming out.

"But I am here so don't cry." I hug her to make her feel safe. "I will never leave you" I grab her hands and start to run.

"So where are we going exactly?" she cried "and why are we running?"

"Ms. Gilmore. Have you ever heard the world surprise?" I said as I smiled at her.

"Just a hint" she kisses me with all of her passion and just when I could respond she breaks us apart. "Please??"

"We follow your dreams." I kiss her this time. "And no more questions"

_**Now would be the time to press that review button and tell me what you thought. I wanted to stop when they fought, but as a big fics reader I know how bad it is when the ending is bad.**_

_**I have some ideas for the top list, but let's make this fics interactive. Tell me what you'd like to see on the list. If you have any suggestions they should do during this year, tell me in the review or pm me about it.**_


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